I am so grateful to God for my loving husband. He is an absolute treasure; and I love and appreciate him so much. I didn’t always feel this way…..but God. There was a time, well actually many times, when I just wanted to walk away from our marriage; but God. I came from a background of divorce, so that was my normal. I had not even considered what the word of God had to say about it; and I definitely was not into the whole submission thing. I might’ve thought that submission came from the pits of hell. In other words; my thinking on marriage was a hot twisted mess. I remember attending a church and striking up a conversation with the pastor’s wife and another lady; while in the bathroom. The pastor’s wife was talking about keeping strife out of the home; and how to handle disagreements with your husband. The thing that stuck with me was when she said that the enemy wants discord in the home, so that he can gain access to your children. As she talked, I came to the realization that I was completely out of order.
I began to look at what the scripture had to say about marriage and strife. James 3:16 (KJV) was a game changer for me. It reads: “For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work. Confusion and EVERY evil work? EVERY EVIL WORK? Wow! This verse hit me like a ton of bricks; and I made the quality decision that I would keep strife out of my heart and home. It was at this same church, that I received a teaching cd on marriage from a very kind woman. When I listened to it, I felt almost something like a rage rising up within me. The wise woman of God was talking about studying and serving your husband; as well as going out of your way for him. Nothing in me liked what I was hearing. I was like: “Nope! This is not for me.” But something deeper in me knew that I desperately needed to learn from and implement what I was hearing.
I begrudgingly started by serving my husband his meals. I didn’t like doing this for a long time; but I continued it any way. During this time, I had begin praying diligently for my husband. I asked God to make me into the wife that my husband needed. I would pray & speak blessings over him as he slept at night. I would also pray for myself. I wanted so much to be in God’s perfect will and do and be who He designed and purposed me to be. As I continued praying, speaking blessings, and serving my husband more and more; I could hear God saying things to me about my husband that helped me gain such an appreciation for him. I recall hearing God ask me the meaning of my husband’s name; which is God is gracious. Years prior, God told me that His grace was sufficient for me. I also remember God telling me that my husband was very loyal; and that he had the spirit of excellence like Daniel; and boldness like Joshua. God told me to look at my husband’s desires list that was hanging on the wall in our bedroom. As I read through the list, I saw that most of his desires had to do with God; but the one that just melted my heart completely, was his desire to be a personal friend of God. It was at that moment that our marriage took off. I fell in love with my husband; and I knew that I’d follow him anywhere. I knew beyond ALL shadows of doubt that we will serve God together until we move over to the next realm.
We now enjoy a beautiful relationship with God and each other. He is the kindest, most loving, most generous, most supportive and most excellent person that I’ve ever known. I just love him so much and love spending time with him! It is my pleasure to serve him anytime and all the time! I made it my mission to make sure that our home would be the Garden of Eden for him. I feel that he is such a gift, treasure and blessing from the Most High; and I want both God and him to know that I appreciate him so much.
It is my prayer that this post blesses whoever reads it….especially those wives who might be in a difficult space in their marriage. God has a perfect design for marriage; and if you’ll yield to His way of doing things, you’ll have a beautiful marriage as well. The thing that I’ve learned about God is that He never sees or deals with us as victims. He sees us as gods; and deals with us this way. We were created in His image and likeness. Psalm 82:6 reads: “I said, ‘You are “gods” and children of the Most High.” It’s time to take your place as a child of the Most High. Don’t be moved by what you see; but rather, by what the word of God says. Below are a couple of scriptures to meditate on for the restoration of your marriage:
1 Corinthians 11:3 (niv) – But I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.
Ephesians 5:21 (niv) – Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Mark 10:9 (niv) – Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
Hebrews 13:4 (amp) –Marriage is to be held in honor among all [that is, regarded as something of great value], and the marriage bed undefiled [by immorality or by any sexual sin]; for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.
1 Peter 3:8 & 9 (amp) – Finally, all of you be like-minded [united in spirit], sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted [courteous and compassionate toward each other as members of one household], and humble in spirit; 9 and never return evil for evil or insult for insult [avoid scolding, berating, and any kind of abuse], but on the contrary, give a blessing [pray for one another’s well-being, contentment, and protection]; for you have been called for this very purpose, that you might inherit a blessing [from God that brings well-being, happiness, and protection].
Isaiah 51:3 (niv) – Indeed, the LORD will comfort Zion; He will comfort all her waste places And her wilderness He will make like Eden, And her desert like the garden of the LORD; Joy and gladness will be found in her, Thanksgiving and sound of a melody.
I started this blog a while ago; but set it aside to focus on my online coaching groups. However, I’m now returning with a renewed focus and message, in this new season of my life. I think that how we see ourselves; and what we believe as our image of ourselves, either prompt us or prevent us from entering into our promised lands….as believers in the Most High God. The biblical story of the Children of Israel prior to entering the promised land is a great lesson about how we see God (Elohim)and how we see ourselves. The twelve spies returned from spying out the promised land. Ten of them brought back an EVIL report; while the other two chose to BELIEVE and SAY what God said ( we are well able). They saw themselves as grasshoppers; and therefore, unable to take possession of their promised land. They wept ALL NIGHT in the wilderness because of how thy saw themselves and God. Wow!!
This tells me that not only did the image that they had of themselves were small; but also of God…..even though He had done some pretty miraculous things for them. Think about that! They were in the wilderness for 40 years, and their clothes and shoes didn’t wear out. He kept them shaded from the sun by a cloud during the day, so that they wouldn’t get sunburned or have a heat stroke. He quenched their thirst with water from a rock; fed them with manna every day; parted the sea and got rid of their enemies. They witnessed all of this; but still were not able to enter their promised land, because of an evil report and how they saw themselves.
How many times have you believed an evil report OVER what God said in His word? The doctor says: You have such and such. Instead of saying: With His stripes I am healed, you instead say what the doctor says. If you find yourself in ANY predicament, you MUST renew your mind with what the word of God says about you. There are quite a few scriptures regarding our identity in Christ. Psalm 82:6 says that we are gods (also John 1:34); and children of The Most High. We’re referred to as God’s treasured possession and the apple of God’s eye, multiple times in the scriptures; as well kings, lords, and so much more.
In the days of Adam and Eve, God gave them dominion over the earth. Jesus came so that we could have that same dominion back. In order to function in this dominion, we have to renew our minds (Romans 12:2) to what God says about us. As we saw earlier with the Children of Israel, two reports came…..an evil one and a good one. Which one will you believe? Are you willing to do the work of renewing your mind?